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This is Me Not Panicking

After things being a slow trickle business wise for five months and dealing with a lot of frustration from one particularly difficult insurance panel, I doubled my client load two weeks ago, and then doubled it again last week. I've even netted two private pays last week, which is unusual, but works better for me because it cuts out the insurance company and I make more money and spend less time on the client because I don't have to spend time doing billing.

Considering I was expecting a slow but steady build up, the change is a bit exhilarating, frightening, anxiety wrecking, exciting....it's a lot of change and fast. And a lot of pressure to be that good, especially if someone is paying completely out of pocket.

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I'm Not Dead Yet, But I'm Rather Fed Up

-Client load is finally picking up. Finally feeling comfortable about making this work, or at least keeping our heads above water. Not sure that we'll ever get ahead and hit our savings targets or, you know, put anything into savings, especially since a lot of my money is going to repairs, because EVERYTHING is breaking down this year. Fortunately the car was a manufacturer defect and paid for by the company and the vacuum was under warranty because it was so new (and likely not designed to handle the kind of damage that a kid with autism causes to a carpet). Now we've got to see what's up with the dish washer, washing machine, and dryer. And get a new mattress for Andy and I. And G is going to grow out of her crib soon, but we're trying to make it last as long as possible, but I have a bad feeling that she's going to start climbing out of it any morning soon. Actually looking forward to getting her a cute bed, but hopefully we'll have money for it when the time comes.

-Amelia the dog has a growth on her shoulder and is going for surgery to have it removed. It might be cancer. She's rather old for a shepherd, so I guess we'll just see what happens.
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Snow White

I remember seeing Snow White for the first time when I was five. I remember enjoying it, and I thought that the scene where Grumpy falls in the creek and then hits his head on the bridge was hilarious. Snow White was never released on video until I was in high school (and my mom was stunned when they did release it), so I've may be seen it two or three times tops.

Overall my kiddos aren't that into traditional 2D cartoons with the exception of the old Mickey Mouse and the Disney Silly Symphony shorts such as "The Three Little Pigs." I decided to try Snow White for that reason. G was entranced, B not so much.

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Fanfic Update

Slayers Resolution: In all, I'm proud of myself for keeping a roughly weekly schedule with this. I never said anything in case I wasn't able to keep up. It was easier at first because the edits weren't as extensive, but once the butterfly effect kicked in it got a bit more time consuming. Right now I'll be good through keeping the schedule through chapter 13, then I may need to take a break. Basing off the series format, the humor episodes are coming up, and I didn't write those in the original. My darling little sister was supposed to because she's the funny one, but she flaked on me. Anyway, one strange thing I was only starting to realize when I originally wrote this is that people do find me funny, and I want to challenge myself as a writer, so I'm going to give it a go and hope they don't suck. Anyway, for now it's good for me to keep the schedule through chapter 13.

The Choice: Ehhhhh...taking a break from this one. Not sure which direction I want to take it. May get back to it in a week, may be a few months.

Spirit of the Protector (title may change): Death could not separate them. Prepare tissues. Was listening to Blackmore’s Knight’s “Spirit of the Sea” yesterday and the idea took root, so blame them.

Aladdin and Mulan

Mulan came out when I was in high school and not interested in Disney movies. I did end up watching it my senior year while I was babysitting and fell in love with it despite myself. Through the years I've watched it on and off and will say I'm more familiar with it than I am a lot of the Disney movies I grew up with. I even debated about it with people I knew in college. I had a group of friends who were really judgmental of the fact that Mulan lied about her gender to get into the army. According to them, after her treachery was revealed, her army pals had every right to distrust her because she was a liar.

It didn't matter that she was doing it for a good reason. It didn't matter that she had saved everyone's life. It didn't matter that society was structured in a way that gave her a huge disadvantage because of her gender. It didn't matter that most people lie every day (for example, how many times have you answered "fine" to the question "how are you today" when you're anything but fine?). Mulan was a liar, and because of that the way her army pals treated her after her gender was revealed was perfectly correct.

Today I rented "Aladdin," which I've not watched since I was a little girl and really haven't thought much about in years. It fell into the category of movies my sister liked more than me (I was The Little Mermaid and Beauty and the Beast all the way, she was Aladdin and Lion King), so I remembered it and stuff, but my go-to nostalgia movies are Beauty and the Beast and The Little Mermaid. So it hit me hard when I realized that Aladdin lied about who he was, essentially to get into Jasmine's pants, and he is never judged for it. In the show he is given a free pass, because "true love" I guess. And while I hear people diss on Mulan for lying and rake her on the coals for it, I've yet to hear people diss Aladdin for it.

And I want to pull my hair out.
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Fanfic: Slayers Resolution, Ch 9

Title: Slayers Resolution Ch 9 of 26, Ickipoo! The Butchered Past, the Resultant Future!
Characters/Pairings: Lina/Gourry, Zel/Amelia
Ratings/Warnings: None
Plot: The gang bands together for what they think is a treasure hunt but finds that the world is once again in mortal peril! This is an updated version of the first fanfic I ever wrote, which was under a different name back in 2002.

FFN
AO3

Anime Review: Erased

As I've gotten older certain anime tropes have started to annoy me more and more. So Andy watches a lot of crap and then wades through it and says, "hey, let's watch this together" or "I want to get your feedback on this one."

And thus we watched Erased together, and it's one of the most innovative anime concepts I've seen in awhile that also managed to avoid all of the tropes that annoy me. The plot is a young man (age 29) has the ability to go back in time and stop fatal events before they happen. When a serial killer who murdered some of his classmates when he was eleven starts killing again, he goes back in time to his 11 year old self and tries to stop the original series of murders from ever happening.

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Progress on the Gender Front?

Back in college I took a class on The Philosophy of Science Fiction. I think it was when we were discussing an Ursula K. LeGuin novel that issues of gender came up. Back then I was 19 and having kids wasn't even a thought on the horizon, but I listened as several classmates talked about having one of each gender and how they gave their boys dolls and their girls cars, but all their kids rejected the non-gender conforming toy. I took umbrage and insisted that even if they were progressive, we live in a culture that strongly promotes gender stereotypes.

I sort of figured if I had kids, it would be two girls like what I had growing up. When I had B, I figured if I had a second it would also be a boy. My mom is one of four girls, my dad one of two boys, and even my cousins who all came in sets of two siblings, it's pretty much two of the same gender with the exception of one brother-sister combo, so we just don't have a lot of the mixed gender siblings in my family. But G was a girl, so much to my surprise I ended up having one of each.

And I wondered if I would find myself eating my words and having to admit that boys prefer boy toys and girls girl toys.

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G on Her Second Birthday

Two years ago, I woke up, 11 days past due and mad as hell that I was still pregnant. Some time after that my water finally broke and I finally got to meet my little girl. She woke up with a fever today, poor little girl, but that didn't stop her from wanting to wear her new dress, and for once I actually got some decent shots of Little Miss Anime Eyes.
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Because I Care Way too Much About This

There's a poll for favorite Slayers character on Tumblr. VOTE FOR LINA! She is being beaten by the male characters, and considering she is a feminist icon in her very own show, not the mention the best character of all time, this is not acceptable and is strangely getting me very mad. Vote for Lina here!

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